And this year's costume IS....

Sookie Stackhouse! But not just ANY Sook, it's the waitress at Merlotte's Sook! Adorned with 2 fang marks on my neck, too. I love the show, duh, and I thought this would be a VERY easy costume (bought the shirt and apron at Hot Topic for a total of $40)...not to mention, I can wear the t-shirt after Halloween, and I can use the apron at work for my art supplies. DOUBLE SCORE for me.

Only thing left is a blond wig. I need to get a decent one, not a big nasty matted one because that is all I seem to find. I'm going to throw on some pantyhose (yes, I know, granny!) and wear running shoes and be set. I wanted a little name tag, too...and even some "flair" for my apron, like a button that says "Sookie is MINE!" -Bill C.

Ohhh, Halloween how I love thee...it's so fun and so many people get in the spirit. I love trick or treaters, I love pumpkins, I love bonfires and hay rides, and I don't mind an occasional scare but I can't get bold enough to say I "love" haunted houses. Ugh..no. Never. That's like saying I love to eat *$@%. NEVER!

Well, happy haunting to all of you....please feel free to share your costume choices for Halloween 2010!

Saying goodbye

So...

I had a very difficult experience this week...one that I've never had before. But what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, right?! I suppose. No, actually, I really do agree with that saying.

For a year or so now I have truly been considering my dog's age and health and wondering when you know it's the right time for euthanasia. I didn't really know if her pottying problems were her Cushing's or her getting back at me for being gone long days, or what. I talked to a few people (who run Rescues around the midwest) and they all pretty much said it is her age starting to show. No, they didn't tell me "It's her age, put her down!" but it's nice to get some advice, and not from a vet who may or may not be trying to keep your dog alive just to pump it full of meds and tests to make $. So, after a few bad nights I just realized no dog is choosing to lay in their cage, in urine, with a #2 in their water bowl. So I spoke to the vet, and I decided it was time.

Let me just say, as a mom to Tana (my 12 year old French Bulldog), I had some rough ROUGH times in the past few years, but nothing nearly as rough as choosing to do the responsible "mom" thing and stay with her for part of her euthanasia. When I arrived, I felt strong and told the vet I wanted to stay. She began to explain the process and I broke down. I decided to stay for just the sedation, not the actual euthanasia. Bad choice. HORRIBLE choice. I sat in a small room with my dog who was a zombie and couldn't even breathe because she was so sedated, so I had to prop her mouth open with my hand. She couldn't move and she couldn't breathe and I bawled and bawled! Awful! I hate that I chose to stay and see her like that, BUT, it shouldn't have been easy for me since I made the decision. It shouldn't be easy because more people would do it way too often. I felt I owed it to my doggie, Tana, to stay with her so she felt loved and safe.

I bawled for a while and had to carry out the leash with no dog attached to it....on to a busy street corner where cars were at the light as I crossed and I probably made them sad just by them seeing me bawling and walking with a dog-less leash! Sorry to anyone who saw me! That's exactly why I didn't want a friend to go with me...I didn't want to make anyone else sad because of my situation. I wanted to be alone. So I was. It was sad to come home that night and see her cage and bed and dishes. I still wake up each morning and think "I better get on some shoes to take out Tana." It'll take time but I know she wasn't happy.

If you want to remember you dog in the happiest way, don't stay for sedation if you ever have to (unfortunately) euthanize your dog! :(

"Want Kids: Maybe"....Maybe? What does that even mean?

Ok, so this question has recently become a part of my life due to the recent membership to eharmony. I guess I don't get why "maybe" is one of the answer choices. What does that even mean? Maybe I'll have a kid....if I feel like it after we date for a few years and maybe I won't because I want to tease you a little bit into dating me when I really don't have any desire to have children. I think it's basically an unfair answer, but hello Allison..when did life become fair? (Or when was it EVER fair?! Wake up, sister.)

And it's funny that I'm even typing this today because just lastnight I must have received a sign from God because as I've been wondering this, I read it in the Glamour magazine I've had sitting on my end table for a month now, waiting for me to finish. So I picked it up on a lazy Friday night (after a 2 hour nap!) and thumbed through it. How random of me to actually read an article, but it mentioned this in one part. And here are the answers some guys responded with:

Steve: "The bigger the net, the more fish you'll catch. If men come out and say no or yes about something so important, they cut their prospects way down. To know where he stands, bring up the subject in a casual way. Talk about your nieces and nephews, or share a childhood experience. Discuss kids as a subject, not a goal, and pay attention to his reaction."

Morreale: "It means he wants kids--when he finds the right person. You women just say, "I want a baby!" Men aren't like that. For us, it's "Well, maybe if I find the right girl, I'll start a family."

Sheffield: "It means 'Kids: very likely,' but he probably prefers to tread lightly. He doesn't want to know the names you've picked out or the best school districts and summer camps. That kind of detail can feel like a job interview. It stresses a guy out if he can sense that you're on a tight schedule and looking for him to check off the 'kids' box."

So, I clearly see 3 different opinions here which gets me even more confused! Why can't guys just check yes or no and quit making this so complicated. I know, at the ripe age of 31, I want a guy who wants kids...so, if you are on a dating site and say "maybe" then I'm most likely not giving it even a glimmer of a chance. So, if your "maybe" means "yes" at ALL, then you've just eliminated yourself from my future. :)

I now see the "reason" this was meant to be

You all are well aware of the saying "everything happens for a reason", but usually, we don't know what the reason is. And, sometimes we never really do. I recently discovered the reason why many things have happened in my career the past few years the way they did. About a year ago, I was asked by a friend's cousin to join a board for a local not for profit arts organization. I accepted, but knew nothing about the organization so I rightly so felt awkward being on a board of "directors". I've learned about it, attended meetings, and different events. At the first event, I met several people but saw another art teacher from my school district who is basically a celebrity in our district and the arts world. I introduced myself and he instantly loved that I was from our school district and sitting on the board. I found out he sat on the same board and was still very supportive of this organization and he was proud to have me represent our school district.

We talked all night, got a picture taken together at the gala, and he introduced me to everyone. Wait a second, PAUSE, and let me back up. The reason I applied for the district in which I work is because my childhood best friend was already working there and told me about an opening. Upon my hiring, I was required to enroll in GCL classes (umm, GCL stands FOR NOTHING! Seriously, it's an acronym with no meaning...what?!). One of the 3 instructors was an art teacher at the high school. We obviously clicked with our subject areas, and we built a friendship upon that initial click. Ok, back to this summer...

So, the organization's president retired and they threw him a retirement party at a local restaurant. I attended and spoke with Larry (the celebrity guy from the 1st paragraph) for a lengthy amount of time about his plans for retirement in the next few years. He laid out his plans, and I mentioned that I'd love to learn from him in these next few years, then apply for the opening his retirement will create. He thought it was a grand plan and then he left. That was the last time I spoke to him because in just a short week or two, Larry collapsed at church and passed away.

As I found out this devastating news, I thought "now what?!" I couldn't help but think that I wasn't going to have the time with Larry to learn from his greatness in order to replace him upon retirement. My GCL friend and I had lunch after the funeral and such, and he told me he was asked to be department chair. I congratulated him, but knew all along he was the logical choice. We then generally discussed the department and the moving around of positions. He mentioned the opening to me in a very neutral way, basically informing me of what was going to happen. I then realized, I need to inquire about the open position. I thought long and hard and talked to several people. They all said the same thing "do it! Why not?" I wasn't ready to leave my family at my school, or all the things in which I was involved. Then I thought "why am I hesitating? If I apply and get the position, it was meant to be. If I apply and don't get the position, then I'm still where I was and no harm is done." So I applied....with the risk of hurting my administrator or offending her because it appeared I was seeking out a new position. No way...not the case.

I called her up, told her, she was very supportive. I applied, interviewed with flying colors (although, I don't really understand the foundation of that saying!), and was asked back for a 2nd interview, this time with the principal. I interviewed, and the first thing he saw was I went to University of Illinois. He was from Decatur. My family is there! We already had the bond. I was offered the position at the close of the interview. I gladly accepted. It all made sense. It all was clear when I sat back and thought about it. Every part of the process was leading me towards this job...the job I have wanted since before I began my certification.

And wait...after I accepted, my GCL friend told me when the excitement of the passing of Larry settled down, he thought "what are we going to do to fill this position!?" and I came to mind. He told the principal I was the one he wanted but didn't know if I'd apply. It was crazy to me to hear this because he never once seemed to be biased or encourage me to apply...we were just on the same brain wave and it just shows this was meant to be.

I'm very thankful I'm where I am professionally, and finally feel like a teacher who enjoys her job. It feels awesome to finally understand such a long process of events.

All I gotta say is DANG!

I've recently encountered a few DANG moments and I have got to blog about them. They are similar, yet very different as you soon will see (or read).

I've been searching for a place to rent, but I am always looking at things for sale, too. Regardless (not irregardless....that is not a word people!), the situation is the same here that made me say DANG! Ok, picture me rollin'...well, scrollin, through the listings on Craigslist and any other realty website. Here it is...WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU EVER TRY TO SELL A HOUSE OR RENT AN APARTMENT ONLINE WITHOUT PICTURES?!?! Oh my gosh, it's ridiculous. It's truly all based on looks. No, your description of "amazing" "breathtaking" "won't be available for long" do nothing for the actual leasing or buying of the place. I get it...your place is basically heaven on earth, and if so, then why are you leaving it? It's just that we all want to see what it's like. I'm definitely a very visual person, but I need some type of idea what it looks like. I don't want some 70's or 80's kitchen to match a 60's tiled bathroom. You may say "quaint" or "lots of charm in this gem" but give me the pictures and let me decide for myself. I would soooo appreciate it!

Secondly, how on earth does any sane or logical person truly believe that he will get any type of date on an online dating site without a picture?! He can't be sane then because I'm pretty sure that is the definition of insane. Then, to request to skip all of the guided communication steps and skip to emailing, still having no idea of who you are speaking to...just not my idea of fun. I archive those folks really quickly if they can't at least post 1 picture of them. And no, I'm not completely vain or basing things on looks, but if I join a dating site then I'm obviously doing it for ME and a physical attraction is important to me. There, I said it, and I'm proud of it. :)

Moral of this blog: Post a picture online, please. It saves us all a lot of trouble. Tons of thanks.

Puppy Fever

I completely have puppy fever right now, and I can safely say it's all thanks to 2 friends who have just gotten new puppies in the past week! First, last weekend, a good friend and practically a brother was in town from California to visit. I stopped by the Labor Day cookout to visit and low and behold, I walk in to find a CUTE CUTE CUTE English Bulldog! I cuddled with him all day and couldn't stay away.

Then, I go back home this weekend and stay with a different friend. This friend just bought a house and her dog was having some separation anxiety from the previous living situation, so she went and bought a Weimy! This little cutie was silver and so adorable. I mean, how can puppies be so cute?! He is amazingly puppylicious.

So, all this puppyness has definitely upped my own puppy fever to probably a 9. Now, don't get me near a shelter or puppies for sale because I WILL walk away with one, if not 2. Just kidding, but really, I'm having big time puppy love and need to keep my distance from them or I'll melt and end up with a family of dogs!

I'm becoming my own Brett Favre

So, I realize I am becoming a version of Brett Favre, but way younger of course. I say this because it has been weeks and weeks since I blogged! That's just ridiculous and inexcusable. So, I'm coming out of retirement and starting fresh. Yes, I mean it. Even if they are short and sweet, that's ok, I need to stay committed to this blog and make it what I originally intended for it to be.

I got to the Rathskeller tonight and join some friends for a going away party. I don't know what it is, but I cannot get the sauer kraut smell out of my nostrils. I KNOW there isn't any in my trash or kitchen, however, I still smell that wretched stench. By the way, it was hands down the most beautiful night for a bier garten in the midwest. *Note: if you didn't read my post about my faves around town, Rathskeller was one of the top spots mentioned...check it out! Woot Woot!

Ok, so this is my official coming out party....well, out of retirement...UNOFFICIAL retirement, that is! I promise to be a good blogger and reliable giver of the Daily Dang.